I haven't been posting as much lately, because my blogger energy has been depleted. When I began the path of recovery and I first began the Buddhist path, there was a lot I didn't understand and a lot I felt I needed to share in order to make progress. At this stage in my path, I don't have that same need, and have therefore stopped publishing regularly. Also, to be totally honest, I have started hanging out on Facebook and that has drained the energy I normally would funnel into a blog post. I posted the story about Lama Chenrezi's blessing because it was such a remarkable event of direct interest to my readers.
Anyway, I have no interest in drinking again, today. Alcohol robs you of your experience. It's like turning on a dimmer switch in your mind. There are outer appearances of having fun. People can be laughing, but in reality you are not present. Why would I want to do that? It's like grabbing for a vase of flowers, that starts to disappear every time you reach for it, but in reality far worse. There's a peculiar mental twist in alcoholics, which for some reason, only remembers the good parts of drinking, however illusory, and never fully contemplates the reality.
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